Keep a song in your heart and a revolver in the hand

 The Great Absurdity of Things

Narcisia sat in the corner booth of the Restaurant Da Gigi Il Troione, a place celebrated for its genuine meals and a wide sense of humor, her favorite one at all. She circled her glass of red wine with one finger, contemplating the man in front of her, knowing already where he was about to land and why he invited her out. Everyone in the room were engaging in the same endless banter about nothing but sex. It was as if the universe had conspired to transform every conversation into a poorly scripted comedy skit, and they were all wrong-footed actors.

“Do you know that you are so damn sexy? ” he said looking into her eyes, a gaze that meant one thing and only that thing...  Narcisa rolled her eyes so hard she thought they might make a noise or get stuck.

“What’s next? his foot between my legs?” Narcisia thought under her breath, her frustration mounting while choosing the Dessert. 

“Hottie, I am allergic to cream but I’m willing some risks to see you try that on me!” the man added with a naughty smirk..

Narcisia took a deep breath and replied with knowledge of the matter. “I can't allow the exposure to allergy triggers, I know what I say, besides I am a doctor...

But her words were met like a one more occasion to flirt.

In that case if something goes wrong you could give me a mouth-to-mouth..

Narcisa sank further into her thoughts, the awkwardness began to morph into a peculiar sort of clarity. Perhaps it was the wine, or perhaps it was simply a side effect of her exasperation, but she found herself devising a plan. A rather radical plan.

What would happen if she were to take him on a… journey? That’s right, a weird, absurdly comedic adventure. He needed to experience something outside the bubble of his own naughty mind, something profoundly ridiculous that would either enlighten him or at least distract him from his current fixation.

After an epic brainstorming session over her second glass of wine, Narcisia had it: “A Road Trip to the Awkward Zone!” A fictional place she conjured from the mists of her imagination that promised strange sights and peculiar attractions, such as the Wishing Well of Regrets and the Museum of Bad Decisions.

The following Saturday, she invited him out—under the guise of a sexual encounter “Trust me. This will be the most exciting thing  you’ve ever had,” her sensual voice announced with a flirteus flair, she winked at him..

They entered  a rusted van, which resembled something more fitting for a junkyard than a road trip. The first destination, according to her non-existent itinerary, was the Wishing Well of Regrets. Upon arrival, it was a quaint little pond nestled in a grove of trees, with an old sign hanging crookedly that read: “Wish Wisely.”

Narcisia approached the well with exaggerated seriousness. “Alright, to make our wishes effective, we must shout out our deepest regrets!” she declared, shooting him a sly grin.

The man was first. He shouted, “I regret that we are not making anything to regret for” 

Narcisia followed, “I wish I hadn’t texted you last Friday night!”

And him: I regret to be here while I could be engaged in a sexual intercourse elsewhere

Narcisia shrugged feeling hopeless

Next up, they visited the Museum of Bad Decisions, a gloriously rundown shack filled with exhibits showcasing the epitome of human folly. Life-sized models of legendary blunders, such as the infamous "Buy One, Get One Free" hair dye incident that left two unfortunate women looking like rainbow unicorns.The man couldn’t help but realized that, despite his expectations, Narcisia had a knack for hilarity and that side of her was sexier than her body.

The climax of their adventure came when they stumbled upon an open-mic night featuring "Most Embarrassing Moments." Narcisia, feeling brave (or perhaps lunatic), decided to participate. Taking the stage, she recounted an exaggerated tale of her disastrous first concert  where everything went wrong, including rotten tomatoes all over them, who subsequently got them slipping  and she fell legs in the air.

To her surprise, the cafe crowd erupted in laughter, not just polite chuckles, but genuine, belly-aching guffaws. As the story unfolded, Narcisia felt lighter, her irritation dissipating into a funny warmth that clashed deliciously with her initial annoyance.

The  man joined her on stage, sharing his own misadventures. The air crackled with joy, and soon the focus shifted from one subject to many awkward moments, embarrassing slip-ups, and the hilarious absurdities of life. They were truly engaging in lighthearted conversation now.

By the time they went back home, Narcisia felt a newfound appreciation for their ridiculousness. Perhaps he wasn't so lacking in depth after all. Maybe beneath his obsession with flirtation and folly, lay a tapestry of shared experiences waiting to unfold.

With a quiet chuckle, she glanced at his excited banter about planning another  trip—a trip to the "Land of Lost Socks" next.